Even before the dulcet tones of the Gay Men’s Chorus of Los Angeles at the 2020 Spirit Awards, Laura Dern’s name has never been off the lips of movie lovers for long.

Her filmography is an eclectic bag of pick ‘n’ mix acting roles, meaning you never know what you’re going to get. If she’s not partnering up with director David Lynch to make a wholly divisive fever dream, she’s nursing dinosaurs with Stephen Spielberg or calling out Meryl Streep’s judgey matriarch in a Starbucks. Rating a Laura Dern performance is almost cosmetic. There’s always an A game approach, like she’s been called into head office to “discuss her progress” when she has a glowing report card.

With her upcoming appearances in Susannah Grant’s Lonely Planet and Florian Zeller’s The Son, fans are awaiting her imminent return to the land of dinos in the June release of Jurassic World Dominion. But before she has to risk her life in the name of a badly thought-out amusements park again, we’re taking on the difficult task of ranking (almost) every major role under the gay icons belt.

49. Bravetown (2015)

A somewhat forgettable teen drama, even Wikipedia is sparse on enthusiasm for this film. Still, Laura sheds a patriotic tear or two.

48. Daddy & Them (2001)

Humble genius or straight-talking rubbish? It’s hard to tell. The cover art does the film’s subject matter no justice, but Laura still plays her long-suffering wife role to a T.

47. Dr. T & The Women (2000)

Want to watch a white, male gynaecologist’s take on the women he meets? Yeah, we don’t either. At least Laura dodges the misogynistic mould by playing an overly nosy alcoholic sister-in-law in this regrettable Y2K title.

46. Teachers (1984)

We can’t lie, there’s not much of Laura here, perhaps…